Shop More Submit  Join Login
×

:icondiinosaur: More from DiiNOSAUR


Featured in Collections

My Favorite Literature by RunningBear5858

Words by teenyxtinyxtina

literature by loverz116


More from deviantART



Details

Submitted on
January 2, 2009
File Size
2.2 KB
Thumb

Stats

Views
567
Favourites
12 (who?)
Comments
29
×
In that disgusting, slobbery way of his he said I was beautiful.
With those half closed, glazed eyes he looked at me.
Those teeth, yellow as the fire hydrant in front of my house.
Crusty, grimey fingernails teared at my thigh as his hand slid.

He was the man who lived next door to my family and I.
He had a little dog named Bill who used to run into our yard.
I always thought it was funny how he had a humans name.
His name however wasn't nearly as funny, not now anyway.

My neighbor, standing a average 6'1" always used to be out in the yard.
I never noticed he was only out when I walked home from school.
Always working on his flowers or trimming the hedges.
He'd say hi to me, like always, and I would respond with a "Hi Mr. Davidson"

Today was different, much, much different.
He was outside, as usual as I struggled home with my grade eight math textbook.
Mr. Davidson grinned when he saw me, he waved then motioned for me to come over.
Reluctantly, I walked onto the grass of his lawn, I didn't like that smile.

"Look, look at these tulips blooming," he said as his hand reached to my waist.
I didn't tell him not to touch me, that would be rude and so I didn't say a word.
Little did I know, that was the reaction he hoped for.
Confidence was his worst enemy, you see, and it was a dangerous thing.

"Want to see the ones out back?" he asked, dragging me along without an answer.
I had to do my homework, I told him but he just said it'd only take a minute.
I agreed, followed, and felt a sinking feeling in my stomach.
His yard had a high fence surrounded by tall cedar hedges, nobody could see in.

He glanced around, almost like he was nervous, then smiled at me again- I didn't like it.
Suddenly, I was on the ground with him crouching over me.
That horrible smile on his face, making my stomach ache and pinch with fright.
"My, you are so beautiful baby," he said with his hand trailing up my thigh.

When it was all over, I had never felt so ugly.
Just popped into my head. Written out pretty quickly.
Mildly inspired by the themes in The Lovely Bones by Alice Seabold.

Hope you like it. Kinda' different and a tad more dark then most of my subject matter.

Not sure if a warning is necessary. No description, just implications. Meh, I'll leave it as it is and change it if necessary.

© DiiNOSAUR at DeviantArt
Add a Comment:
 
:iconthedbmonster:
thedbmonster Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2009
Neat! I think you have a good eye for narrative poetry. (Not that I know much about it). I think you should keep recording the overflow of inspiration.
Reply
:icondiinosaur:
DiiNOSAUR Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2009
Thank you so much C:

And I will, for sure!
Reply
:iconphotographybychilb:
PhotographyByChilb Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2009
I KNEW IT!
I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!
I knew you would mention Lovely Bones!
/excited

I just read that the other day. Sat in the same position for three-four hours straight reading.

Anyway, adore this. Great portrayal of the scene. I like how you added the touches about his dog with the human name. Made it seem more real.
Reply
:icondiinosaur:
DiiNOSAUR Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2009
Oh did you? What did you think of it? It's one of my favourite books, I think. It's just an amazing story, my gosh, I didn't get much sleep when I was reading it D:

And thank you sooo much C:
Reply
:iconphotographybychilb:
PhotographyByChilb Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2009
I loved it. Its was written exceptionally well, and I love how she paid so little attention to who had been her best friends during life. I felt her, Ruth and <guysnamehere> became best friends despite barely knowing each other when she was a life. It really was inspirational. I'll be reading Lucky as soon as I get a hold of it.
Reply
:icondiinosaur:
DiiNOSAUR Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2009
Lucky was sooo amazing! It was just... a real, raw story. A page turner, of course. I'm planning on reading The Almost Moon soon, too.

Yesyesyes, I love how character-driven the story is and how much her death changes the lives around it. How it builds and destroys relationships. Gosh, it's amazing.
Reply
:iconalecbell:
AlecBell Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2009
A stark piece of story telling.

Might it have been possible to contextualise the scene more fully in prose?
Reply
:icondiinosaur:
DiiNOSAUR Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2009
Oh most definitely. I dunno, I wrote this back when I sort of when I was exploring poetry.

It could definitely have been written in prose, though.
Reply
:iconlindzgal:
Lindzgal Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2009   Writer
This was a great write. Chilling!

I read The Lovely Bones and before i saw your comment at the end...this reminded me of it.

I think its about to be a movie soon...

Nice Job here!
Linda
Reply
:icondiinosaur:
DiiNOSAUR Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2009
Thank you so much~

And yes, it is going to be a movie soon. I'm super excited for it C:
Reply
Add a Comment: